John Mayer

Posted on December 24th, 2008Tweet0

Interfaith Baking, Issue 4

Hello, and welcome to this, the last posting of holiday cakes.
I'm taking a quick break from a marathon gift wrapping session, so forgive the shorthand...
Remember, life isn't short, but it's small... so enjoy it all.

Andrea shows us the undying spirit of the Jewish faith, in the form of dreidel cookies.

Drina, showing off her skills on a kid face logo.

Joseph knows the key to my heart, and that's marshmallows. Imagine how delicious they all are now, days after this photograph was taken. I'm jealous.

Jillian shares with us a Rockwellian view of winter fun.

Kaitlin and Mason share an image of unrequited love.

Brenda displays the simple beauty of the holidays by way of a Poinsettia cake.

Brandon takes in his own work, a gingerbread John Mayer Trio. Brilliant work, Brandon!

Kelly taps into the spirit of Stop This Train... No better way to enjoy the bridge of the song than during the holidays.

Giovanna keeps it elegant. Cupcakes working together to make the plate a better place.

Madigan shows one of my more pensive poses...

Anna and Adrian bring the latest 'JM' logo to life.

Jenn is original and bakes the face of Rudolph.

Charvella believes I have a better butt than I really do.

David's portrayal of a botched home burglary. (Kidding.)

Pamela loves her dog so much...

... that she celebrated it with a cake. I love this one. I'm laughing right now, but only because it's cute.

Ami celebrates all ways of life.

Molly interprets the guitar cake in a wonderful way.

Amelia shows us the many moods of Santa.

The Sanders Family keeps it real... It is true, while Pino and I are made of Evergreen trees, Steve Jordan is an African American spruce.

Nicole puts loving detail into each cookie.

Amanda is beautiful, as is her cake's play on words.

Marissa and Magladena would like me to get back into the studio. Got a huge laugh out of me.

Katie's work is so unbelievably good that I wondered if it were lifted from the internet, until I read the stockings.

Thank you all for sending me your baked goods... I wish I could have posted them all, but I know that everyone who sent a picture had the opportunity to really connect with the holiday spirit, and I hope that's worth the time and effort.

And I thank you all for helping me to connect with my holiday spirit.

Enjoy every moment.

All my love,
John

Posted on December 17th, 2008Tweet0

Interfaith Baking, Issue 3

Time for more public displays of confection...
(bows, turns, bows.) Thank you.

I have to say that even though I was 98 percent earnest in the call for fans to bake cakes, I'm humbled by just how sweet the pictures I've been seeing are. I don't want to get too heavy-handed here, but there's something sort of moving about seeing friends and family huddled around a cake, posing together with huge smiles on. The baking might have been spurred on by my blog, but I have a feeling that by the time it's all said and done, there is more to it than that.

Here are just a few of the hundreds of great creations sent to interfaithcakes@mac.com.

Sarah's JM Ornament - love everything about it. Even the photo is perfect.

Leanne sends this Christmas tree cake. I love the way the frosting looks like leaves. Very claymation. But Leanne, I have to call you out on one thing. And you tried to get it past me. You Photoshopped the star!!! You had what you thought was a weak sauce star so you superimposed a "better" one on. You CGI'd a cake!! What did we learn today? To let artistic flaw shine through!!!

Update: Leanne took to filming a YouTube video holding the star in her hand and proclaiming her innocence in the face of my charges of Photoshopping. It seems that with a great amount of video post production, she has meticulously gone through frame after frame and made it look convincing enough that the star atop the cake is, in fact, completely real.
(I stand corrected.)

Michelle made a cake version of the "On His Own" show at the Nokia Theatre.

Kate decided not to hide her cake-making superpowers. And why? If you can slam dunk it over everyone's heads, no reason not to. You Bruce Lee-d this cake. Great job. In their FACE!

Kimberly went portrait style on this cake. This tells me a lot about her, namely that she's a crazy dreamer and gives herself high-level creative challenges. I'd say this is a fantastic success. Reminds me of those old toys called Oddballs. Remember those?

Jovanna wins for best graphic design on a cake. Perfect layout. This cake makes me happy. Extremely creative.

Michelle rocks the fondant and shows us the social habits of snowmen. This beautiful work inspires wonder as to what cake lies inside the igloo.

Blake thinks in 3-D. He designed a cake from a true architectural standpoint.

Love the final result (use of live cookies brings the fantasy world and reality into a unique composition.)

Jason and Maria got together to bring the legend of Saint Nick into a more contemporary framework. I'm not sure what kind of car this is. The cultural reference suggests a Lexus but the front grill screams Rolls Royce Phantom. Either way, Santa looks none too pleased with his wife's display of free spirit.

Here's where the heart melting begins. You still think this blog is just for getting my kicks? Behold.
Brothers Liam, Caleb and Sumner made this cake, and it's beautiful on many layers. "Happy Whatever" suggests not only an open-minded wish for joy, but hints at a darker apathy that sometimes lurks under the surface during the holidays. A smashing success.

Look at these boys. A handful indeed. These three are growing up to be some cool kids, you can just tell. Little Sumner on the right looks like he might become a Jedi... Well done, boys!!!

Denise baked in a multimedia format, and that's quite original. Cake tree, fudge gifts. This allows for people to enjoy the presents while the tree is still standing. Great user interface on this one.

Look at Denise's daughter. Is that not the best ever? I can't think of a better Christmas smile in the entire world.

Jill made a cake after my own heart. This is one of my absolute favorites. It's got the Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer Special look, and the design work is brilliant. Lots of negative space on a cake is brave and cool. Sometimes less is a lot more. You know what they say, "it's not the frosting you lay down, it's the frosting you DON'T lay down." A +.

Danielle made this awesome leg lamp cake. I don't think I need to say more. Brilliant.

Holiday Spirit Meter: through the roof!!!

Thanks everyone, and to answer a question that a lot of people seem to have, let's say that you should get your baking in by December 22. I can't believe that I'm actually coming up with baking contest deadlines. This is too funny.

Posted on December 10th, 2008Tweet1

Why Every Snarky Blogger Should Thank Don Rickles (And What They Still Have To Learn From Him)

   No matter what the decade, no matter the technology, no matter the state of public consciousness, the salient rules of entertainment will always apply: if you're going to make someone laugh at the absurd, tell some truth with it; if you're going to make someone cry, give them a silver lining to look to; and if you're going to insult someone, as the legendary Don Rickles has for the last 55 years, always end it with a wink and a smile. That's the essence of tension and release. It lies at the core of artistic expression, and its importance can't be ignored for long.

   Snarky gossip bloggers, take heed: you will never have a better knack for cutting people down than Don Rickles does, and you owe much of your success - both pecuniary and otherwise - to the groundwork laid by him.

   There's no doubt that at their most irreverent (and yes, mean), gossip blogs can be truly funny. After all, as Rickles has shown the world for years, there's infinitely more material to be mined in the delicious details of the detested than there are in the lauded. Five words for good, five thousand for bad.

   But there's one element that has always gone missing in the new era of dissery, and perhaps it's the most important part of the game. It's what's given Rickles the room to move with almost diplomatic immunity through cultural stereotypes and sensitivities: that effusive smile, the "not really", and most importantly, the implicit "me too". It's what has given Rickles both his edge and his charm for over five decades, and its absence in today's gossip media is what will soon lead to a population tired of it.

   At Rickles' recent performance at Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut, he made Perez Hilton look like a sycophant. Nobody - and I mean nobody - has what it takes to point out a morbidly obese man in the front row and call him out on it in song. (The man laughed hysterically.) After ribbing two men on stage, making fun of both them and their wives, he had handlers walk bottles of champagne to their seats, thanking them for playing along and suggesting they enjoy the bottles in their hotel rooms while making love. It doesn't make the bite any less sharp, but it invites people to return to the lion's cage.

   If, in the blogosphere, there is any semblance to Rickles' style of dressing the very wound he's inflicted, it seems only to come posthumously; if you're a celebrity and you want to sniff out who actually wishes you'd get killed by a grizzly bear flying a helicopter and who was only joking about it and had no idea it would actually happen, swear to God, you have to die to find that out. I appreciate kind thoughts in the wake of my passing, but they'd go to better use while I can still hear them. Or is that too much kindness for one person to be allowed?

   Wouldn't it be nice, every once in a while, to read some sort of evidence of heart? An occasional 'We kid, the guy's okay??' Unless you really don't, in which case you won't be sorry when that bear shoots me with a rocket launcher. Mark my words: the gossip-monger whose style closest resembles that of Don Rickles' mastery of tension and release will stay successful the longest. Because the salient rules of entertainment will always apply. And Don Rickles should know, because he helped write them.

Posted on December 10th, 2008Tweet0

LIVEBAKING. (6)

What is the holiday spirit about? It's about joy. It's about not worrying about what ails you. It's about great conversation, levity, and fun. And to that I present to you the final product.

It's not perfect as you might normally think of it. But it's the perfect embodiment of a great evening. And I know it's going to be insanely delicious. I just wish I were hungry for it and not tanked to the gills on frosting and peanut butter M&Ms. See you tomorrow on the way back to my car from working out. I'll try to smile.

Bundt cake 2.0 coming soon.

Posted on December 10th, 2008Tweet0

LIVEBAKING. (5)

Super-hot frosting. Hoping to decrease viscosity and increase spreadability.

Okay, not great, not bad. Adding some shredded coconut might work.

Hrrrrmpph. This is not what I had in mind. Look, I'm gonna level with you. I'm not going to get a top score on this one, but this is about bringing a 2 to a 6. Maybe even a 7. Let's see what we can do. I can tell you this, there's a real-deal bundt cake coming in hot very soon.

Posted on December 9th, 2008Tweet0

LIVEBAKING. (4)

Trouble in paradise.
Turns out the cake pan is made for the "bundt" style.
This is a straight-up vanilla cake, the kind that really needs frosting, not glaze.

Tried making a glaze for a vanilla cake. Right on the fence here, people.
Do we make the wrong cake for the glaze or the right frosting for such a delicate cake?
Note to readers: sifting sugar does not produce powdered sugar.
So I'm getting in the car to go buy what we need.
A hammer.

I don't feel like getting into the car. We're going to try to microwave frosting for a while and see if we can't get this stuff glaze-y.

Must adjust white balance on camera.

This is getting exciting...

Posted on December 9th, 2008Tweet0

LIVEBAKING. (3)

Bb - C - Ab - Ab(octave down) - Eb....

Cooling off....

Posted on December 9th, 2008Tweet0

LIVEBAKING. (2)

Pouring the mold.

Tonight's watch is a ref. 1680 "red" Sumbariner, issued to the Peruvian Air Force. The only
brown dial "feet first" dial I've seen. Bezel faded to a gorgeous gunmetal gray. Sorry. Sorry. Back to cakes.

The mold has been poured and is now ready to be baked.

45 minutes bake time. That's enough time to enjoy a Christmas classic.

Posted on December 9th, 2008Tweet0

LIVEBAKING. (1)

We're taking this baking thing to eleven now.
You can't deny it.

An unprecedented moment in internet history.

Livebaking starts.... NOW.

The artists' tools

A tease of the cake mold...

Tonight we go with a vanilla cake.

Stay tuned.

JM

Posted on December 9th, 2008Tweet0

Interfaith Baking, Issue 2

Wenyee sends us this beautiful penguin cake. Digging the texture of the frosting and the snow effect.

Made by Ivana and her daughter Sophia. This cake is beautiful, creative, and more difficult than it looks. It's not easy to lay a pattern that convincingly.

"Hi John,
Here is a holiday cake that my daughter Sofia (8) and I made together yesterday.
She helped mix and bake it, fill it and spread the frosting, but I had to do
most of the white snowflakes. Hope you like it. We sure had fun making it.
Thanks for creating this contest. It sure makes the holidays brighter!"

Valerie, you rock. You created a Rolex reference 16520 Daytona with color-change dial. Though this may not inspire holiday cheer among all readers, it makes me feel cozy all over. Let us not forget that material goods make people happy, and nothing makes someone happier than walking into things on Christmas morning because you can't stop staring at your new timepiece. Or your new cake. This may be the worst counterfeit watch I've ever seen, but as cake goes, it's the genuine article.

Emily sends in a beautiful array of Christmas cupcakes. This is a winner in two ways; not only is each cupcake beautiful in its own right, together they form the ultimate bouquet of holiday cheer. The Voltron of cupcakes. Well done.

By far, the most common cake I've been seeing is the guitar cake. I wish I could post them all, because they all look like they took serious time and creativity. I'm posting this one because it may be the best of the bunch.

Note the yellow cake pickups.

Pretty amazing stuff. Again, to all cake-makers, your submissions are breathtaking. Lots of people have seen these cakes and their response is always the same. "You've got some FANS!!" Yes,...yes I do.

More to come very soon, along with a new cake by yours truly...

Keep that holiday spirit meter high!!!

John

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